Yeh yeh, i was running as fast as i can to get back to you. i felt the time quickly slipping under me as i was gathering all the pieces left to build a new beginning. In the midst of all the New York chaos, i nervously made calls back home spoke to Dad and asked how you were doing. But i never made a direct call to you. i worked hard as i could to build my new life in NY and to also create a time and space for me to fly back to you. i kept your picture with me before i left home, for some reason, i may have subconsciously knew that i needed it. Finally, after some time, i booked a flight back Home on my birthday week. A few days before my flight, i got the message that you passed. Im sorry i was late. While i was away, i thought about our walks when i was a little girl and how i wanted to spend time with you to learn more about what was on your mind and heart, and to share with you my dreams. i miss you and love you… as i am still allowing time to guide me to peace of your passing.
- yes thats me blowing the candles with my grandfather, my “yeh yeh”
In losing my grandfather recently, I cant help but think how its like losing a deep sense of true education, which is our bridge to our elders that are great examples of tradition and culture while living in this current chaos of American society. In the western world, I feel like although we are surrounded by many different cultures we are made to think or perceive that the great values of these cultures are not “fit” to keep up with modern times. Being born in America, this frame of mind can be easily set in a subconscious level. Yes, we are surrounded by “expressions” of different cultures but it seems we embrace them in our lives as “accessories” or entertainment that feeds into a market-driven culture or capitalist society. We are not aware enought to reach deeper inside of a culture and learn great values that can perhaps serve better for our development in these modern times.
Our perception of cultural difference or even a perception of “superiority” has widen the gap between our roots, and the knowledge of Self, the concept of family and Home. It is amazing how numb we became submerging ourselves in a certain way of thinking set by others. It takes courage to see past your reflection and take off the mask of social roles, and ask oursevles how did I become so disconnected from my roots? I, myself have to admit that I am guilty of this.
Our elders carry tradition in their hearts. They embody values of their culture and are key figures, message carriers that are great examples that we can learn from, the good and the bad. This is the basic unit of true education. Lets close the gap.
Love,
Lei
